Change

My soul waits and longs and hopes for change. Change in the worldly sense has always quickened my heart in excitement; I grow easily bored with circumstances and as I find myself in the midst of one milestone, I am hasting to look to the next one ahead. This has always been the case for me. Whether its going away to college or leaving to study abroad or finishing college hockey or getting married, I continue to look with excitement to the challenges and newness that change brings.

I have seen the capacity for both sin and righteousness to spring from my love of change. As Paul says to "be content in any and every situation, whether living in plenty or in want" (Philippians 4:12), I know I must guard against the discontentedness that is rooted in my joy and hope being in my circumstances and not my Savior. I must also fight the desire to escape present circumstances that are uncomfortable and painful, yet are intended as discipline and santification for my soul. As Job proclaims in the midst of calamity, "Though He slay me, yet will I hope in Him...Indeed, this will turn out for my deliverance" (Job 13:15-16), I long to believe steadfastly in who our God is and the promises He has given us, that I may remain faithful in the midst of trials and be filled with a joy that is found in the presence of God and not the presence of wordly comforts and peace.

I have also seen the good that desire for change brings. It allows me to be open-handed with the present things God is giving me. It allows me to see a vision of what could be and what is to come and to pray with expectation of what the Lord will do. It gives me zeal for the present, knowing that so much must change in me that I might reflect the Lord more fully and remain faithful in any and every circumstance.

This is the change that the Lord is giving me a vision for right now- the change that He promises is His will for me. Sanctification. That I will not remain the same, stuck in my sin, hindered in spiritual progress by the same things over and over again. That as I follow Him, pressing deeper into His Word, being renewed by His mercy and grace morning after morning, and being compelled by His Spirit that dwells within, He promises change. Change of the heart and soul to reflect the Son. Change of the inner person that is more sure than any circumstancial change could be. Sanctification. He promises "that we all, with unveiled face beholding the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from one degree of glory to another" (2 Corinthians 3:18). That the things I am excited yet feel unprepared to do right now- be a godly wife, love younger women with wisdom, be gracious in relationships, be humble and servant-like, are the product of beholding the glory of God now. Fixing my eyes on Him now. Tasting and seeing the goodness of God now that changes the soul to be more like Jesus to equip me for the future things He has for me.

I pray that we would desire to look more like Jesus, knowing that only He can change us, and that pursuit of His glory is for our joy both now and in the future.